Over the past few years, adapting to different environments as a male in his late teens, I have noticed a very distinct difference between the two genders. Ladies, I have no idea why, but I have constantly heard how hard it is to make new friends with other females. This made me realize how easy it is to meet men, not in a gay way, just in a hey mate, just wanna say that you're lookin' okay mate...Anyway...
-For starters, movie quotes are crème de la crème for "male bonding". Think about it, guys mostly watch all the same movies, and we often quote movies in everyday speech. I know I do it more often than any one should. However, anyone who picks up on me saying, "He called the shit poop," knows that I'm talking about Billy Madison, and I can have a discussion with this person for like 20 minutes on one of my favorite movies of all time.
-Likewise, making references to anything that men should know is the exact same way. Although, I have always said that making them is a crapshoot, because you look retarded if no one gets references, which is why I try to make them very subtly. For instance, in my introduction, I made a Flight of the Conchords reference...P.S. if you got that, let's be friends. If not, what are you doing with your life http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h2LpeA3jcEU
-My buddy Kevin visited me at school this weekend. Knowing that half my friends at school played hockey, as did Kevin, I introduced him as follows, "Yo Nick, this is Kevin, Kevin, Nick, you both play hockey." Needless to say, the combination of that and NHL '09, he got along with my friends pretty well.
-Free T-shirts...forget about it. I am constantly comparing my collection. Not only do the shirts themselves create for discussion, but the ridiculous events we show up to just to get a breast cancer awareness t-shirt make for a good laugh or two. Hell I admit that a huge reason I donated blood was for a free t-shirt. It's for the greater good, right?
-I realized that months ago during the time of Halloween parties, that is a terrific way to meet guys (NHI). Think about it, this even works with the girls...sort of. The costume itself is a conversation starter, let alone you already know an interest of the person you are talking to. I don't need to spell it out for you, it makes sense, trust me. I'm only friends with Ace Ventura fans now because of this.
-After telling you what you should already have known, I'll leave you with something I thought of after being constanty frustrated with how the NFL and all of football is so slow because of all the reviews and stuff. You know how dogtags work for those invisible fences, they totally need to set up a similar system with the endzone and the ball, but instead of a little shock, all they'd need is a light to go on in the stadium somewhere. Boom goes the dynamite (btw, Will Smith said boom goes the dynamite last night during the Academy Awards...viral videos are spreading everywhere) - http://www.faniq.com/blog/Video-Will-Smith-Says-Boom-Goes-The-Dynamite-At-Oscars-Blog-19665
Monday, February 23, 2009
Monday, February 2, 2009
Sungoations 3
So yesterday was Superbowl XLIII. While it was one of the most exciting superbowl games of all time, I got all of my excitement out of the boxes. At every point during the game, I'd root for safteys, going for 2 extra points, field goals instead of touchdowns (I had terrible numbers like 5-5, 9-5, etc.) I was rooting for the boxes more than the Cardinals (I hate the Steelers, give it up to Roethlisberger though, he had a great game.) Anyway, I've noticed many interesting things over the past few weeks that don't involve sweaty men.
-On the train the other day, I saw this guy listening to his iPod. He was laughing hysterically; I thought he must have either been listening to a comedian or was crazy. That's when I thought back that I have definitely listened to Mitch Hedberg with headphones on in a public place before, and someone probably thought I was crazy, but how can you not laugh at, "I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it."
-The worst thing for a soccer goalie must be having to get the ball out of the net after he's scored on. That's when I thought that the equivalent of that in baseball would be the pitcher having to go get the ball after a homerun. That would suck.
-Why can't McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, etc. all agree on a 92 cent menu. It's not a 99 cent or dollar menu when you have to spend $1.08. The dollar menu should mean, "I have a dollar, you have some food, let's trade on even terms."
-You know the soandsoscreenname is typing... thing on AIM? I hate it when I am having a conversation, and I'm about to say something, but that comes up, so I wait for them to say whatever they need to say. It'll come up for like 5 minutes, so I'm thinking wow this is gonna be great! Then it just disappears, and you wasted 5 minutes of your life because the person probably just left a letter in the input box.
-I do love however, when you accidentally interrupt someone else's conversation, they type into your conversation for a few seconds, and either realize it and change it, or they send you, "omg, i love john and kate plus 8, too!!" How embarrassing.
-'Apart' and 'a part' are like completely opposites. That's retarded.
-The path between campus and one of our buildings off campus is narrow enough to only let 3 lanes of side by side walking. It's very awkward when you'll be walking with a group of 4 (2x2), and are walking by another group of 2x2 people. It's even worse when you merge, don't realize there's someone you know in that group until after they pass, and now it looks like you are ignoring that. You'll make it worse if you turn around and shout something, just keep walking, explain later.
-I'll end with my rolled up sleeves theory for sweatshirts. Most sweatshirts are designed so that if you have the sleeves down to the end, the sleeve is a little loose, thus allowing a draft to get in and make you a bit chilly. If you roll up your sleeves a little bit, sure it exposes your forearm, but your overall body is warmer because you now have that seal that prevents the draft from entering at the arm holes. It's worth the forearm sacrifice, trust me, try it out.
-On the train the other day, I saw this guy listening to his iPod. He was laughing hysterically; I thought he must have either been listening to a comedian or was crazy. That's when I thought back that I have definitely listened to Mitch Hedberg with headphones on in a public place before, and someone probably thought I was crazy, but how can you not laugh at, "I'm against picketing, but I don't know how to show it."
-The worst thing for a soccer goalie must be having to get the ball out of the net after he's scored on. That's when I thought that the equivalent of that in baseball would be the pitcher having to go get the ball after a homerun. That would suck.
-Why can't McDonald's, Burger King, Wendy's, etc. all agree on a 92 cent menu. It's not a 99 cent or dollar menu when you have to spend $1.08. The dollar menu should mean, "I have a dollar, you have some food, let's trade on even terms."
-You know the soandsoscreenname is typing... thing on AIM? I hate it when I am having a conversation, and I'm about to say something, but that comes up, so I wait for them to say whatever they need to say. It'll come up for like 5 minutes, so I'm thinking wow this is gonna be great! Then it just disappears, and you wasted 5 minutes of your life because the person probably just left a letter in the input box.
-I do love however, when you accidentally interrupt someone else's conversation, they type into your conversation for a few seconds, and either realize it and change it, or they send you, "omg, i love john and kate plus 8, too!!" How embarrassing.
-'Apart' and 'a part' are like completely opposites. That's retarded.
-The path between campus and one of our buildings off campus is narrow enough to only let 3 lanes of side by side walking. It's very awkward when you'll be walking with a group of 4 (2x2), and are walking by another group of 2x2 people. It's even worse when you merge, don't realize there's someone you know in that group until after they pass, and now it looks like you are ignoring that. You'll make it worse if you turn around and shout something, just keep walking, explain later.
-I'll end with my rolled up sleeves theory for sweatshirts. Most sweatshirts are designed so that if you have the sleeves down to the end, the sleeve is a little loose, thus allowing a draft to get in and make you a bit chilly. If you roll up your sleeves a little bit, sure it exposes your forearm, but your overall body is warmer because you now have that seal that prevents the draft from entering at the arm holes. It's worth the forearm sacrifice, trust me, try it out.
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